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If You See Something, Say Something
#1
THE FOLLOWING NOTICE WAS POSTED ON A BULLETIN BOARD IN THE CREW BASE AT PENN STATION, NEW YORK. I DON'T BELIEVE ITS OFFICIAL.
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During this summer season of heavy vacation travel, when numerous unaccompanied minors are traveling on our trains, the Amtrak Chief of Police has requested that all Conductors and On Board Service employees be especially vigilant, due to the recent unusually high number of cases of "Child Molestation" occurring on our trains.

As an example, the Chief stated that if you should observe a Conductor in a bedroom, with his pants down around his ankles, and a young boy on his lap, you should contact the Amtrak Police Department immediately.

Also, you should be alert for signs of terror in a young boys face whenever a Conductor walks by and smiles at the boy. If instantly upon seeing the Conductor he starts screaming for his mother, and shouts, please, no more, no more, I'll sit down and keep quit, your should contact the Police Department immediately.

The exception to this rule is: If it is the Conductor's own son or daughter sitting on his naked lap, or bent over a suitcase in the baggage car, then no notification is required because Amtrak believes it is none of Amtrak's business how a Conductor reprimands and disciplines his own children.

Remember, it is in the interest of all of us that we be vigilant, and do everything necessary to insure that children are safe on Amtrak trains, because molested children grow up to vote democratic.

This message is brought to you in part by, Your Non Molesting Friends at Amtrak, the Y.M.C.A., and, Uncle Buck's Kids Appreciation Center.
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#2
This is seriously fucked up! Not sure if it is a PSA or a very lame attempt at humor!! I know we work with a lot of people who have dark humor but this is just wrong...
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